


Good Morning (I Think I'm Into You, This Is Dangerous)

by saltwaterstarlight



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Drinking to Cope, Implied/Referenced Underage Drinking, Jealousy, Jihoon has it bad, M/M, Pining, Seungkwan is a lightweight, Songfic, Soonyoung has a dance crew, and is also occasionally the best roommate, basically they're all in there, bc chan is a baby, dance au, i guess?, unrequited crush?, who knows read to find out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-14
Updated: 2016-05-14
Packaged: 2018-06-08 08:44:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6847588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saltwaterstarlight/pseuds/saltwaterstarlight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jihoon fell hard for Choi Seungcheol. It wasn't pretty and Jihoon was positive that his feelings were going to be left unrequited, but most of the time Jihoon could deal. He could handle seeing him on campus, he could handle seeing him dancing with the rest of Soonyoung's dance crew, he could even handle just being friends with him, but he couldn't handle seeing him with Seungkwan. The one Jihoon was sure that Seungcheol liked better than him. So when Soonyoung suggested that they all go out for drinks one friday he was unsure to say the least. </p><p>AKA. the one where Jihoon gets drunk and says a bunch of stupid shit.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Good Morning (I Think I'm Into You, This Is Dangerous)

**Author's Note:**

> A fic inspired by Good Morning by Verbal Jint, the song that I think every Jicheol shipper has cried over at least once, God knows I have.

As Jihoon sat on the old, worn, studio sofa, watching his friends move with the beat of the music, he wondered when exactly he had let himself become such a masochist.

 

Had he been one this morning, when he had accepted the sweatshirt that Seungcheol had given him, as they stood shivering out in the cold waiting for Soonyoung to show up with the studio keys? 

 

Had he been one yesterday, when he had let Soonyoung convince him yet again to come and watch him and his dance crew go through their newest choreography? Soonyoung always swore that he needed Jihoon’s attentive eyes for making sure that everyone stayed synched, but Jihoon was well aware of Soonyoung’s hopes for setting him up with Seungcheol. Roommates kept few secrets between each other.

 

Had he been one all the other times he had let himself get dragged along to practices? Or all the times when he had gone over to Hansol’s apartment to copy psychology notes? Not because he needed to -he never missed a class- but only because he knew that a certain, beagle-eyed, roommate would be home as well.

 

No. The more he thought about it the clearer the answer became. The moment Jihoon had let himself become such a masochist was the moment when he had let himself fall utterly and devastatingly in love with Choi Seungcheol.

 

They had met a couple of months ago, when Soonyoung had decided one night to bring his  _ entire _ dance crew -all ten of them- to their tiny two room apartment. Let’s just say that Jihoon hadn’t exactly been ecstatic about it.

 

Nevertheless Soonyoung had forced him to introduce himself to everyone, but when Wonwoo’s boyfriend showed up Jihoon decided that he did not want to spend his evening with twelve people in one tiny bedroom. So he excused himself to escape to the quiet of his own room.

 

And he had been very content with this. Honestly. He liked being alone, prefered it even. Of course that hadn’t stopped some nosy guest from knocking on his door. 

 

“Yes?” The door opened slightly and a boy stuck his head in. He had black hair and a curious expression on his face. Jihoon had just stared at him. The boy stared back for a moment, but then he seemed to snap back into reality.

 

“Sorry,” he scratched the back of his head, “I was just curious where this door led.” 

 

“Yeah,” Jihoon snapped the book he was reading shut, “with the astonishing number of two doors -not including the one with a bathroom sign on it- in this apartment I completely get the mystery.” Jihoon deadpanned. He was being rude, he knew that. Still, the intruder remained unphased. Instead of answering he just walked straight into Jihoon’s room like he owned it, straight to Jihoon’s electric piano. 

 

From Jihoon’s place on the bed, he watched him tentatively press down on the keys. The piano wasn’t on so the only sounds that could be heard were the soft thuds of the actual keys being pushed down, but Soonyoung’s friend didn’t seem to mind. The neon lights that always shone outside Jihoon’s window - _ gave them real low rent and Jihoon didn’t mind _ \- colored the boy red. Jihoon thought it made him look unreal.

 

“Do you play?” The boy had finally asked, looking up from the ivory keys. 

 

Jihoon could’ve continued snapping at him. It would have been easy. It was a pretty dumb question since the piano was standing in _his_ room. But Jihoon’s irritability had somehow passed.

 

“Yeah,” he said instead, “do you?” The boy smiled at him, although it didn’t quite reach his eyes.

 

“Nah,” his eyes turned to the signs outside, “I wish I did though.” 

 

After a moment’s silence he turned back to him.

 

“Play me something?” The request was straightforward and to the point, like everything about this guy seemed to be, and yet Jihoon had no idea what to make of him. Still, he got up and sat down by the piano, his guest hovering over him.

 

“What do you want to hear?” 

 

“Anything.” 

 

Jihoon’s fingers hesitated above the keys for a moment, but then they settled. Guilty by Dynamic Duo had been the first song to pop into his mind, so that was what he had started playing. 

 

At first he only played, but eventually he began singing a bit as well. Not very loud, barely enough to be heard, but the boy heard. He could hear him humming along and when they reached the verse he spoke the words softly. It wasn’t quite rapping, it felt a bit too subdued for that, but whatever it was Jihoon liked it.

 

Jihoon planned to only play a chorus or two but he ended up playing the entire song start to finish. It was as if he got stuck in some sort of trance, stuck in a world where nothing outside of his room existed. As he played the final chords he heard the boy sigh, but when he turned around he was smiling.

 

“That was really good.” He looked down at Jihoon, his honest brown eyes crinkling a bit from the smile on his lips. “ _ You’re _ really good.” Jihoon felt his ears heat up.

 

“Thanks.” He managed, dumbly. “You too.”

  
  


As jihoon looked at the boy he had an urge to reach out for him, to touch his skin, to say his name. They had been introduced a couple of hours ago but Jihoon realized, a bit shamefully, that he’d already forgotten it. 

 

“Sorry but,” he swallowed. _ Why did he even care?   _ “What was your name again?” 

 

The boy regarded him for a minute, Jihoon’s ears only growing hotter, but then his smile grew even wider.

 

“Seungcheol,” he held out a hand, “Choi Seungcheol” 

 

Jihoon had taken the offered hand with slight hesitation. 

 

“I’m Jihoon.”

 

_ Seungcheol _ had moved to say something but was interrupted by a booming voice calling out for him.

 

“ **_Seungcheollie! Come on, we’re leaving!_ ** _ ”  _

 

A boy stood waiting in the doorframe, with a hand on his hip and a foot tapping the floor impatiently. 

 

“Hold on Seungkwan, I’m coming.” Seungcheol gave Jihoon one last smile and turned to leave with this Seungkwan.

 

_ Choi Seungcheol,  _ Jihoon had thought.  _ Choi Seungcheol _ , desperate to remember it. Blissfully unaware of the pain that said name would come to cause him.

 

Back in the studio, Jihoon was  _ extremely  _ aware of said pain because for some god forsaken reason  _ Choi Seungcheol _ had decided to wear a tanktop today. Exposing more muscle than what was good for anyone and Jihoon couldn’t do anything but stare.

 

Here came the masochistic part, for all the months that Jihoon has been pining this is all that he’s allowed himself. To stare. It took about a week for Soonyoung to notice Jihoon’s feelings and he’d been pushing him to make a move ever since, but he didn’t understand. There were people like Seungcheol and then there were people like him. Seungcheol was nice, Jihoon was not. Seungcheol was popular, Jihoon usually didn’t leave his room unless he had to. They might talk and act like they’re close, but Jihoon knew exactly how far apart they actually were. 

 

So he sat, watching, wanting. By now a sheen of sweat had settled on Seungcheol’s well-toned body, making his skin gleam under the lights. Watching Seungcheol’s arms work, muscles flexing, had Jihoon biting his lip hard enough to draw blood, and whenever he’d raise them up his abs would peak out from underneath the hem of his shirt and it took everything Jihoon had not to let out an audible groan.

 

He was in hell, and having The Number One Boyfriend Of The Year ™ sitting next to him wasn’t exactly helping. Right now he was torn between imploding from his own sexual frustration and murdering Mingyu every time he opened his mouth.

 

Mingyu had been sitting at the very edge of his seat for the entirety of the practise, watching his boyfriend with awe in his eyes, shouting out “Wa!” and “Go Wonwoo!” every five seconds. Making Wonwoo send him slightly embarrassed but very affectionate looks. Sometimes, if Mingyu was lucky, he’d run over to give him a peck on the forehead. And sometimes, if Jihoon was  _ un _ lucky, he’d give him something a bit more... intimate. 

 

It wasn’t that Jihoon was jealous or anything. They were just being excessively gross and them sucking face always got everyone’s attention, and he didn’t like Seungcheol’s gaze anywhere near his probably cherry red face. 

 

The practice only lasted for about an hour but for Jihoon it felt like an eternity. He’d never been as grateful to hear Soonyoung’s voice as he was when he called out to let everyone know it was time to pack up.

 

“Great job today everyone! But I gotta lock this baby up now or Hyelim-noona will get mad at me for messing up the practice schedule.” 

 

Hyelim-noona was the woman who owned the studio. Jihoon had only met her twice and to be honest she intimidated him. Which is saying a lot because Jihoon isn’t usually the type to be intimidated by anyone. 

 

Jihoon went to pick up his bag but Soonyoung apparently had more to say.

 

“Anyways,” he flashed a smile to the rest of the group, leaving his authoritative leader-character behind, “since it’s a friday, and we’ve been doing so well today, I thought why not celebrate with drinks?”

 

A cheer made it’s way through the room that made Jihoon jump.  _ Right,  _ he thought, these kids are always looking for an excuse to party. Jihoon was certain that Soonyoung would try to drag him along.  _ But not today, _ he thought, he’d already suffered enough at the hands of that scheming boy. Jihoon was going to go home, finish his psychology homework, and stay up all night watching youtube videos. 

 

“So I was thinking we could stop by the apartment before we head out, because I smell like mad sweat and that is not the fragrance that I am going for for tonight.” He was interrupted from his plans by his always enthusiastic roommate, who was currently spinning his headband, drenched in said sweat, around his index finger and giving him the sparkly eyes of please-do-as-I-say-Jihoon.

 

“Sure I’ll follow you back to the apartment,” Jihoon began, fixing the straps on his backpack, “but you’re on your own after that, because I’m not going.” Soonyoung’s smile dropped.

 

“What? Come on Jihoon it’ll be fun! And besides,” Soonyoung lowered his voice slightly, “ _ Seungcheollie  _ will be there.” 

 

“My point exactly,” Jihoon tried very hard to ignore Soonyoung’s stupid wiggly eyebrows. “ _ This-”  _ Jihoon gestured around him, voice nothing more than a hiss at this point, “-was excruciating enough for me, I’m not going to willingly subject myself to anymore torture at the hands of you, okay?” 

 

“You know Jihoon,” came Soonyoung’s disappointed voice, “if you continue like this you’re going to end up alone with ten cats by the time you’re forty.”

 

“Well, at least then I’ll get some peace and quiet.” Jihoon made his way towards the door but realized halfway there that he was still holding on to the sweatshirt that Seungcheol had given him this morning. He looked over to where Seungcheol was sitting, chatting with  _ Seungkwan _ , and for a brief moment he debated just leaving and taking the shirt with him. Of course, rational Jihoon knew that that was stupid and that he should just go give it back like a normal goddamned human being. 

 

So he made his way towards the duo and luckily for Jihoon Seungkwan had just gotten distracted by one of Seokmin’s more  _ creative  _ dance routines. Jihoon  _ thought  _ that he was supposed to be some sort of pigeon, but he was far from sure. 

 

“Hey,” Jihoon met a pair of kind brown eyes and he felt his insides melt into a mushy puddle on the floor, “here’s your, uh, shirt.” 

 

“Oh, I totally forgot about that, thanks.” Seungcheol flashed him a smile. His skin still had a glow to it and his dark hair was beautifully ruffled from Seungcheol presumably running his fingers through it. Jihoon didn’t understand how he managed to look so pretty and not gross after working out this hard. 

 

“Hey,” Seungcheol interrupted him from his thoughts, “did Soonyoung say where we’re going tonight?” 

 

“No, he hasn’t said anything to me, but I’m staying at home anyways so it doesn’t really matter.” Jihoon tried to sound as casual and nonchalant as possible, but he probably failed.

 

“What?” A crease formed between Seungcheol’s eyebrows and Jihoon had the impulse to pinch it.  _ What the fuck brain. _ “Why not?” 

 

The genuine disappointment in Seungcheol’s voice made Jihoon’s heart flutter, but he still tried to remain cool. 

 

“Well, I have a paper that I need to finish by tuesday.” Jihoon looked away, “and besides, I’m not part of the dance crew or anything so, I don’t wanna intrude.” 

 

“Hey come on, you’re a  _ little _ part of the crew.” When Jihoon looked Seungcheol was smiling again, and Jihoon felt a tugging on the corners of his own lips. 

 

“Yeah, well you don’t wanna see me dance.” He let out a small laugh at the thought of it.

 

“Quite the opposite,” Seungcheol’s smile widened, “and what better opportunity than tonight, with the safety of darkness and the suffocating smoke machines tearing up our eyes?” 

 

Looking at Seungcheol Jihoon knew that he was fighting a losing battle with himself, and so he caved.

 

“Alright.”

 

“Alright?”

 

“Alright, I’ll come.” Seungcheol’s eyes crinkled with joy as he stood up, victorious.

 

“Great! I’ll see you there then!” He patted Jihoon on the shoulder and ran of to where Seungkwan was currently sitting, red-faced from laughing at one of Seokmin’s impersonations.

 

Jihoon made to leave discreetly but as he turned around he was met by an eavesdropping Soonyoung.

 

“Not a word.” Jihoon warned, and promptly ignored Soonyoung’s shit-eating grin all the way back to the apartment.

 

A shower, a change of clothes, and about 20 000 smug comments later, Jihoon and Soonyoung made their way towards the decided meeting place. 

  
  


As they walked around a corner Jihoon spotted their quite impressive company gathered at the edge of a park. They were all standing in a big cluster on the sidewalk, aside from Wonwoo and Mingyu who were talking a little bit to the side, holding hands - _ gross _ \- and Jihoon thought that they all must be a pain in the ass for passerbys. 

 

The closer they got the more prominent someone’s panicked voice became.

 

“Are you sure this’ll work Hyung? What if I get caught?” Chan was standing with Hansol and Jisoo, holding a plastic card in his hands.

 

“It’s cool Chan, this guy is mad good alright? He’s like an artist or something.” Jihoon realized that they were talking about fake-ID’s, with all of his own problems Jihoon had forgotten that Chan wasn’t old enough to drink yet. Still, he wasn’t sure if putting all your faith into Hansol’s hands was the best decision in this moment. Or any moment for that matter. 

 

“Besides,” Hansol continued, putting an arm around Jisoo’s shoulders, “if the doorman gets suspicious we can just confuse him with some english rambling, right Josh?” 

 

_ Josh _ did not look on board with whatever make-shift plan was forming in Hansol’s brain.

 

“I’ll have no part in this.” He just said, removing himself from Hansol’s grip and making his way towards the other Hyungs. Leaving a disappointed Hansol and an even more panicked Chan in his wake. 

 

As Jihoon’s eyes followed Jisoo he spotted Seungcheol amongst their little crowd, for once without his younger companion. 

 

“Hey,” Seungcheol had spotted him as well, and was walking up to him, “you made it.” He was wearing ripped jeans, a black bomber jacket, and his usual gut wrenching smile.

 

“What?” Jihoon replied, trying his best to sound offended. “You thought I’d bail?” 

 

“Well to tell you the truth I wasn’t sure,” Seungcheol began, “I thought you might change your mind once you got home.” Seungcheol moved to touch Jihoon’s arm and Jihoon felt his whole body tense up.

 

“But I’m glad you came.” Seungcheol smiled and Jihoon could hear himself talking, only there weren’t any words coming out of his mouth, only a mush of random syllables.

 

And then he was gone again. The group had started moving, and Seungkwan had promptly showed up to drag Seungcheol along with him. A bit shakily Jihoon began walking himself.

 

He walked in silence, watching Seungcheol’s back, noting with dismay that Seungkwan currently had his arm intertwined with Seungcheol’s. Seungkwan was telling Seungcheol some story, waving his free hand around and generally being very enthusiastic, and Seungcheol was listening with a fond expression. 

 

Jihoon imagined that very scene, but with him in Seungkwan’s place. Just walking down the street, talking about nothing in particular, and having Seungcheol look at him like that. The thought tore him apart, but still he couldn’t look away from him as they walked. Even though being this far apart made Jihoon feel miserable, there was still some happiness in just looking at Seungcheol.  _ Feelings are weird, _ Jihoon thought to himself.

 

“You know, Seungcheol is going to think he has a stalker if you keep staring this hard.” Jihoon craned his neck to look up, and up - _ damn this boy and his genes _ \- to meet Mingyu’s eyes. 

 

“Haha, very funny. I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He wasn’t being  _ that  _ obvious, was he?

 

“He’s talking about how you look like a kid on christmas who just had all of his toys stolen.” Wonwoo joined in. Jihoon wondered if he’d ever had a conversation with either of them alone, he guessed that you just had to accept them as a package deal. 

 

“I do not.” Jihoon replied, giving Wonwoo a mock smile. 

 

“You do, and I’ve got good news for you,” Mingyu pointed towards Seungcheol’s frame, “your toy’s right there, so go get him and stop looking so sad.”

 

“You did not just refer to Seungcheol as my toy.” Jihoon closed his eyes in frustration. This was why he didn’t hang out with these two. They had no tact whatsoever, and that’s coming from someone who lived with Kwon Soonyoung.

 

“You’re missing the point here Jihoon,” Wonwoo continued, “ the point is that you need to go there and get what’s yours.”

 

“Yeah, well even if I  _ did _ -not that I’m planning to- how do you suppose I’d get between  _ that _ ?” Jihoon gestured towards Seungkwan’s iron grip. Wonwoo just gave him a knowing look.

 

“Think of it as.. Incentive.” He just said, and then the two disappeared through the doors of the bar.

 

Jihoon followed, slightly bitter. It’s so easy for them to talk like that, they already had each other. They didn’t know how difficult it was to want someone who so obviously didn’t want you back. Because Seungcheol didn’t. I didn’t matter how many pep talks he got from Soonyoung, Jihoon was well aware that he just liked Jihoon as a friend. Seungcheol was just a friendly guy, and besides it was pretty obvious who he actually liked. 

 

It was always like this, Jihoon gathers courage to talk to him and everytime he’d try Seungkwan was right there, attached to Seungcheol’s hip. He’d always spot the two on campus, walking to class together, talking, laughing. He knew how it was, and it kind of made him regret coming in the first place. 

 

They all sat down at a row of tables, Jihoon of course sitting with Seungkwan separating him from Seungcheol. It didn’t take long for Jihoon to down his first beer, or his second. He decided to order something a bit stronger after that, if he was going to suffer through this night he might as well do it shit-faced. 

 

Halfway through his new vodka filled drink Jihoon felt someone kick his shins. He looked across the table and found Soonyoung giving him the concerned eyebrows. He opened his mouth to tell Soonyoung that he’s an adult and that he does as he pleases, but he was interrupted by a very loud laugh coming from his left. 

 

“Oh my god, that is literally the best thing I’ve seen all week!” Turns out that Jihoon wasn’t the only one who had set out to get real drunk real fast. Seungkwan was looking at something on Seungcheol’s phone with an empty glass in one hand and tears rolling down his cheeks from laughing.

 

“Wait, you know what was the best thing I’ve seen all week???” Seungkwan was slurring a bit on his words and Jihoon recalled Seungcheol telling him once how much of a lightweight Seungkwan was. “Seokmin’s pigeon impression, oh my god Seokmin please do it againnn..” 

 

Seungkwan was already in a laughing fit but when Seokmin started bobbing his head back and forth and making cooing noises Seungkwan practically howled with laughter. Jihoon was a bit tipsy himself but looking at Seungkwan had him feeling stone sober.

 

Jihoon looked over Seungkwan at Seungcheol but he just smiled and shook his head at the scene. As soon as Seungkwan had finished his laughing fit he apparently decided that Jihoon would be his next drunken victim, and promptly draped himself over the shorter boy.

 

“You know that I think that you’re great, right Jihoonie???” Jihoon cringed at the nickname but nodded along. “You’re so coool and smaaart, and I  _ loveeee _ that your hair is pink. Like what’s up with that??” Seungkwan was laughing again, but suddenly the laughter turned into sobbing. 

 

It came completely out of the blue and Jihoon had no idea what to do.

 

“I-It’s okay Seungkwan,” Jihoon was patting his back awkwardly, “you can colour your hair pink too if you want to?” Seungkwan just started sobbing harder and Jihoon was becoming more and more panicked.

 

“I just want to dance!” Seungkwan exclaimed at last, and Jihoon was completely dumbfounded. “I don’t care about history, I don’t know why I picked it as my major. I just wanna dance, not write a 12 page report on Napoleon the Great!”

 

Jihoon sent a panicked look to Seungcheol. Jihoon was not good at comforting people. At all. Right now all he could manage was a pat on the back and an awkward “there there”. Luckily Seungcheol took the hint.

 

“Come on then Seungkwan,” Seungkwan looked up, “if you wanna dance, let’s dance!” 

 

This seemed to brighten Seungkwan’s mood somewhat, because he’d stopped sobbing and let himself get dragged out on the dancefloor. The absence of a sobbing Seungkwan brightened Jihoon’s mood until he realized that he now had to watch Seungkwan and Seungcheol  _ dancing  _ instead of talking, which brought his mood back to where it had been a minute ago. 

 

Soonyoung must have noticed because when Jihoon reached for his fourth drink he stood up and suggested that they all go dance, probably in an attempt to defuse the situation. Jihoon was grateful but still stayed behind with his trusted drink.

 

Jihoon closed his eyes and tried to focus solely on the light dizzyness that came from being tipsy. After a while he became afraid of opening them again, afraid of having to watch whatever was currently going down on that dancefloor.

 

“You know you’re not going to solve your problems ostrich style, right?” Jihoon cracked one eye open to look at the ever so eloquent couple that had apparently stayed behind with him.

 

“Oh look, back with the living are we.” Wonwoo had taken his shoes off and was currently sitting with his legs on Mingyu’s lap.

 

“Please leave me alone to wallow in my own drunken misery.” Said Jihoon, definitely not drunk  _ enough _ to deal with these two.

 

“Afraid I can’t do that  _ Jihoonie _ , seeing you this miserable is actually making  _ me  _ sad.” Jihoon’s expression softened at this apparently more empathetic side of Wonwoo. “It’s like watching a fish flopping around on dry land.” Nevermind.

 

“Yeah well, there’s not much I can do about it so too bad for you.” Jihoon flashed another one of his glorious mock smiles.

 

“Oh but there  _ is, _ ” Wonwoo continued, seemingly unfazed, “you just have to be a little bit more…” he trailed off, squinting his eyes in search of a word.

 

“Hands-on?” Mingyu tried.

 

“Hands-on.” Wonwoo confirmed, giving his boyfriend a smile that had Jihoon fake -or not so fake- gagging.

 

“What I  _ mean _ ,” Wonwoo gave him an unamused look, “is that you should just go dance with him, dummy.”

 

“Really?” Jihoon let out a laugh at the absurdity, “have you seen me? I am not going out there with a bunch of semi-professional dancers.”

 

Wonwoo said nothing but pointed to Jisoo out on the dance floor doing a strange rendition of the running man with Hansol naenaeing in the back. Jihoon just stared.

 

“Point taken.” 

 

The dance floor was pretty crowded and despite having a semi-clear view of Seungcheol from the tables it didn’t take long for Jihoon to lose sight of him, especially after having downed Wonwoo’s drink -much to Wonwoo’s dismay- in one go before setting out.

 

Eventually he saw him, dancing with Seungkwan and being  _ a bit _ too close to each other for Jihoon’s liking, and with all the courage he could muster, Jihoon awkwardly shimmied between them. 

 

A part of Jihoon’s brain (the tipsy part) was proud of him for being this daring, but most of it just thought that he was stupid for making a fool of himself. 

 

But apparently not Seungcheol. In the murky light of the club Jihoon could see Seungcheol’s smile as Jihoon danced in closer. They danced -or hopped let’s be honest- to the music for a while, and Jihoon catched Soonyoung -bless his soul occasionally- making sure that Seungkwan had all his focus on him and not Seungcheol, giving Jihoon some time without having to worry about getting cut off.

 

Tipsy Jihoon was braver than sober Jihoon so at one point he pretended to stumble into Seungcheol, grabbing a hold of his jacket, and then he just kind of stayed there for a song or two, holding on to Seungcheol.

 

Seungcheol didn’t seem to mind, so after some time Jihoon hesitantly lifted his hands to rest them on Seungcheol’s shoulders, carefully searching for any signs of disapproval. No such sign came and instead Seungcheol kept one of his hands at the small of Jihoon’s back for the continuation of the song.

 

Jihoon felt more like a highschooler at prom than an adult in a bar, his lips felt numb from liquor and his stomach was filled with butterflies. The music was blaring loudly but to Jihoon it all felt very far away. Everything except Seungcheol. 

 

Jihoon studied his face carefully. He followed the curve of his nose, saw the way his left dimple was slightly deeper than his right, he noticed a dent in the skin right by Seungcheol’s jaw, and he wondered where he got it from. But nothing could ever prepare Jihoon for his eyes, those beautiful brown eyes that had him so scared and at the same time kept drawing him in. 

 

Jihoon’s gaze kept flicking down to Seungcheol’s lips, they were very close, he mused. Seungcheol was smiling, at Jihoon, and the spot on Jihoon’s back that had Seungcheol’s hand on it kind of felt like it was on fire.

 

Jihoon saw Seungcheol’s mouth form words that couldn’t be heard, and then all Jihoon’s brain could register was that mouth, those lips, inching closer to him.  _ Was this actually happening? _

 

He closed his eyes.

 

“ **_You wanna go grab a drink?!??_ ** ” the scream was merely inches from Jihoon’s ears and it made him jump. He opened his eyes to find Seungcheol looking at him with arched eyebrows.

 

It took a second for Jihoon to register that what Jihoon had thought to be an attempted kiss had just been Seungcheol trying to make himself heard. Jihoon just nodded and let himself get dragged off the dance floor, trying his best to hide his disappointment.

 

“I have to say,” Seungcheol began, sitting down at the now empty table - _ Jihoon didn’t want to know where Wonwoo and Mingyu had went off to _ \- , “I did  _ not _ know that you could dance like that Lee Jihoon.”

 

“I guess I’m a man of many secrets.” Jihoon simply offered.

 

“Oh really?” Seungcheol arched a playful eyebrow. “Mind sharing any?”

 

“What-” Jihoon turned to Seungcheol, giving him a confident smile, “-and lose my  _ mysterious allure? _ ” He then promptly dissolved into giggles, Seungcheol joining him. 

 

After laughing for a while they both somewhat regained their composure and Seungcheol let out a small sigh.

 

“I’m glad you came tonight, Jihoon. I’m honestly having more fun than I thought I would.”

 

“I’m actually kind of glad I came too,” Jihoon confessed, stirring the melting ice cubes in his cuba libre. “Although I’m sure you would’ve had fun without me too.” He pointed towards Seungkwan who was currently attempting to stage dive into the crowd from the mixer table.

 

At first Seungcheol looked a bit confused by Jihoon’s statement, but as he turned and saw the spectacle he just smiled.

 

“Yeah, Seungkwan he’s..” Seungcheol sighed, “ _ something. _ ”

 

After a moment of silence Jihoon decided to tread the Seungkwan infested waters with a question, half-curious and half-terrified of the answers he might get.

 

“How long have you and Seungkwan known each other?”

 

Seungcheol thought for a bit.

 

“I guess since high school?”  _ six years longer than me _ “He was just a tiny sixth grader but I guess he just kind of went and claimed me, and I haven’t gotten rid of him since?” Seungcheol was laughing, and Jihoon managed a fake chuckle. Barely. “I know he might seem like a little much but he really is a good guy deep down.” Seungcheol was smiling that fond smile of his and Jihoon wondered how he’d let himself become naive again. Even thinking that Seungcheol would’ve kissed  _ him _ just a couple of minutes ago. 

 

They carried on talking for while, not about Seungkwan but about a lot of things. School, Jihoon’s shitty job at McDonald’s, and whether that thing that’s been living in the back of Hansol and Seungcheol’s fridge really _ was  _ lasagna. 

 

Just when Jihoon had finally started to enjoy himself again he felt a distinct buzzing in his pocket. 

 

**Soonyoung:** Seungkwannie just threw up like his entire life in the bathroomTT_TT, taking him home to sleep it off otllll.

 

**Jihoon:** He ok???

 

**Soonyoung:** Think so, idk he’s pretty out of it

 

**Soonyoung:** But don’t worry!! I got it under control bc I’m the best hyung ever and all that

 

“Everything ok?” Seungcheol must have noticed Jihoon’s furrowed brow, because he was looking at him with a slightly concerned face. 

 

“Yeah I don’t know, Seungkwan’s not feeling so good apparently.” 

 

“What?” Seungcheols face turned serious in a matter of seconds. “Where is he?”

 

“Soonyoung’s taking him home but-”

 

“I gotta go see if he’s okay.” Seungcheol was out of his seat and already on his way, and the fear of losing Seungcheol exploded in Jihoon’s chest.

 

“Wait-” Jihoon grabbed a hold of Seungcheol’s sleeve, “Soonyoung has it under control, so please-” the words got stuck in his throat.  _ Please don’t go _ .

 

Seungcheol looked torn. His eyes kept shifting towards the door, but finally his features softened.

 

“Not ready to go home yet?” He asked at last.

 

“Not by a long shot.” Jihoon answered.  _ With you next to me I might never be, _ he thought.

 

Seungcheol just smiled and sat down again, and then they were talking like before. Occasionally they would catch some of their friends leaving, but the further into the conversation they got, the more tipsy they (at least Jihoon) became and the less attention they paid to their surroundings.

 

It wasn’t until one of the bartenders came to tell them that they were closing up that Jihoon realized that they were pretty much alone in the bar. Seungcheol seemed surprised as well.

 

“It’s already this late?” He looked at his phone, which showed 02:07, as they walked outside. “Well, my bus is that way so I guess I’ll see you-”

 

“Let’s go on a walk.” Jihoon blurted out before he could stop himself. Seungcheol just looked at him.

 

“You want to go on a  _ walk _ at this time of night?” He knew it was stupid, but right now Seungcheol was  _ so close _ , and Jihoon was not ready for the loneliness of his own bedroom. Luckily Seungcheol responded by smiling and waving him along, Jihoon was quick to follow, although a bit unsteady on his feet.

 

Jihoon soon discovered that drunkenness was the perfect excuse for being clingy. After about 10 meters Jihoon grabbed a hold of Seungcheol’s arm to steady himself as they walked, and Jihoon didn’t think that he’d ever been that content. 

 

Jihoon walked along happily, shamelessly nuzzling into Seungcheol’s arm, humming on a familiar tune. He didn’t feel like talking, didn’t feel he needed to, he was content with just being close to Seungcheol, having him for himself.

 

“You have a really nice voice you know.” Seungcheol said, looking down at his smaller companion.

 

“I know,” said Jihoon, feeling rather confident, “you told me that before.”

 

“I did?”

 

“Yup, that night we sang together,” Jihoon’s voice softened a bit, “you told me I was good.” 

 

“You remember that?” Seungcheol looked genuinely surprised and Jihoon punched him -albeit playfully- with his free arm.

 

“Of course I do!” Seungcheol just laughed. “It made me really happy.”

 

“Yeah, well it’s true.”

 

They walked in comfortable silence for a while, but eventually Seungcheol decided to break it.

 

“You said you were a man of many secrets,” Jihoon looked up at his companion, and when Seungcheol met his eyes Jihoon could see  _ something _ glimmering behind those brown eyes. “Mind sharing any?”

 

The question hit Jihoon like a punch in the gut, thousands of thoughts rushing through his head in just a few seconds. He had no idea what to do so instead he just nodded and leaned in close to whisper in Seungcheol’s ear.

 

“I’m reeaaaaaal drunk right now.” He whispered, and then he was laughing. It wasn’t exactly a lie, but it wasn’t entirely truthful either. Regardless Jihoon thought he was being funny, but something about Jihoon’s comment seemed to rub Seungcheol the wrong way.

 

They returned to silence but this time it wasn’t comfortable in the least. Seungcheol kept looking ahead, seemingly lost in thought, and Jihoon felt like he’d lost him. 

 

After a few minutes of excruciating silence Jihoon finally decided to ask Seungcheol what was on his mind.

 

“I’m just worried about Seungkwan.” Seungcheol was looking at his phone. “I haven’t heard from them in over an hour.”

 

“I’m sure they’re just sleeping off the buzz.” 

 

“I guess.” Jihoon got the feeling that Seungcheol wasn’t listening. “Could you just-” Seungcheol made a gesture with his hands and Jihoon stopped walking. Seungcheol put his phone to his ear and walked a couple steps ahead.

 

The light from the neon signs on the buildings painted the entire sidewalk red. It reminded Jihoon of the night that they met, the way the color settled on Seungcheol’s skin, but this time it was making Jihoon breathless for all the wrong reasons. 

 

Seungcheol’s voice was sweet and soft when he spoke through the phone. He was smiling through his words, looking down at the stray flyers on the ground. Jihoon felt like crying. Everytime he heard him call out Seungkwan’s name in that gentle tone it felt like someone was ripping out a little piece of his heart.

 

Suddenly Seungcheol felt a million miles away. Unreachable. Who was he kidding? He’ll never have him. He was just being a selfish child, thinking that if he wished hard enough he could make Seungcheol fall in love with him. But he couldn’t. This was the real world and in the real world Seungcheol will always care more about Seungkwan than anyone else, including Jihoon. The road felt like it was spinning and Jihoon wasn’t sure if it was the liqour or something else.

 

“-Okay. Sure. I’ll be over in a sec.” Seungcheol finished his call, but before he could say anything Jihoon took a decisive step forward.

 

“Do you want to know a secret?” He walked towards Seungcheol, who stood frozen in place. When Jihoon stopped in front of him, sorrow was swelling in his chest. There was a big clump in there that made Jihoon unable to breathe, weighing him down like an anvil. Jihoon felt the ground give in again so he placed his hands on Seungcheol’s shoulders in an attempt to find support.

 

“I’m in love with you.” Jihoon was slurring on his worlds. He had to look like an absolute fool, but it didn’t matter, he was already pathetic. He rested his head on Seungcheol’s collarbone, too ashamed to look him in the eye anymore. Looking down at their shoes he saw nothing but colorful blobs.

 

“God-” He stifled a sob. Seungcheol’s smile, his laugh, his  _ beautiful eyes _ , it was all flashing before his eyes. “-I’m so,  _ so _ in love with you.” Jihoon felt Seungcheol’s t-shirt become wet from tears, he felt a pair of hands on his hips. 

 

“Jihoon-” Seungcheol began, but Jihoon shushed him with a finger against his lips.

 

“Don’t. You don’t have to say it Seungcheol.” He looked him in the eye. “I already know it, so please,” The lights colored Seungcheol’s face red. It felt like the end. “Just don’t break my heart anymore than you already have.”

 

With trembling hands Jihoon carefully cupped Seungcheol’s face and then he is placing the gentlest of kisses on Seungcheol’s lips. His lips were so numb that he couldn’t even feel if Seungcheol was kissing him back. He only tasted the salt from his own tears.

  
  


When Jihoon cracked his eyes open he was in the same room as usual. Light was shining in through the window, his piano was standing in it’s usual place, everything was as usual. Only something felt wrong. 

 

Jihoon tried sitting up and his head felt like it was going to crack open any second. He was cold and he felt miserable. He looked at the crumpled sheets beside him and realized that he was alone, but that wasn’t anything out of the ordinary, so why did it make him feel sad?

 

He closed his eyes, trying to remember last night, and flashes started to appear. The dancing, the drinking, the-

 

“Oh my god.” Jihoon placed his head in his hands. “I told him I loved him.”  _ Fuck fuck fuck. _ He told actual fucking Choi Seungcheol that he loved him, and he was crying and  _ the kiss, oh my god the kiss _ . 

 

Jihoon closed his eyes and all he could see was Seungcheol’s pitying face. He’d gone and done it now. Usually he messed up his friendships by being too cold, being too loving had never been a problem. Of course, that didn’t mean that Jihoon wasn’t capable of fucking up meaningful connections with that as well. 

 

He threw his head back on the pillows. What the fuck would he do now? He tried to remember how he got home but all he could remember was the salty taste of his own tears. 

 

“Shit.”

 

He fished his phone out from underneath the sheets.  _ Do I call him? _ Jihoon felt his cheeks heat up.  _ No way. I’m still too fucking embarrassed.  _

 

He decided to send him a text instead, but what would he text? “I’m sorry I kissed you?” “How did I get home last night?” “Please forget everything?” Jihoon didn’t want to sound like a rambling fool -he’d done enough of that already- so he settled for a simple, two word message.

 

Good morning

 

He fell back on his bed. A minute passed, five minutes passed. He looked at his phone.

 

Good morning

read: 08:47

 

Jihoon tossed his phone across the room. Great. He fucked up. Fucked up bad. Just as Jihoon contemplated screaming into his pillow in frustration there was a knock on the door.

 

_ Great. Soonyoung lost his keys. Again.  _

 

Jihoon slowly made his way to the door. He was ready to take all of his pent up frustration out on his locked out roommate, but as he opened the door he was left stunned.

 

“Good morning to you too.”

 

Standing on the other side of the door was Choi Seungcheol. With a coffee tray in one hand and his phone and a takeout bag in the other. He looked as calm as ever, smiling his usual easygoing smile, and Jihoon just stood frozen in place like a moron. 

 

“Wha- how, you’re-” Seungcheol just ignored Jihoon’s stammering and walked past him into his room, settling down on Jihoon’s bed. 

 

Jihoon approached Seungcheol like he would a predator, quiet and slow, and was hesitant to take the coffee handed to him. Seungcheol patted the bed beside him and Jihoon carefully sat down.

 

They sat in silence. Jihoon had too many thoughts running through his mind to actually voice any, so he just drank his coffee. It was strong, with just a little bit of milk, just as he liked it. 

 

“Why are you here?” Jihoon’s voice was low, and he had his eyes fixed to the floor. 

 

Seungcheol just laughed, which made Jihoon actually look at him, feeling confused and just a little bit frustrated.

 

“Wha-”

 

“You were out like a light,” Seungcheol interrupted him, looking too amused for his own good. “I didn’t want to wake you up, so I went and got breakfast.”

 

“But how are you- Why are you still- Jesus I kissed- I kissed you-” this time it was Jihoon’s turn to be shushed.

 

Seungcheol’s lips were a bit chapped, but still soft as they pressed on to Jihoon’s. Jihoon could taste the coffee that Seungcheol had been drinking. Something sweet, with caramel.

 

“Like that?” Seungcheol pulled back, eyes soft in the sunlight shining in from the window, but Jihoon just stared at him. Seungcheol smiled that amused smile again. “I guess you don’t remember me kissing you back?” Jihoon was in too big of a shock to do anything except for shaking his head no.

 

“Well I did. It wasn’t the most eloquent confession I’ve ever received, but considering that I’ve been crushing on you for months I’m not one to complain.” 

 

“What about Seungkwan?”

 

“Seungkwan?” Seungcheol snorted, then he began laughing.

 

“What? Aren’t you dating?”

 

“Seungkwan’s like a little brother to me Jihoon. He’s just very, touchy-feely.”

 

Jihoon couldn’t believe what he was hearing, this all seemed too good to be true. Seungcheol was sitting on his bed, telling him that he’s been in love with Jihoon all this time, and Jihoon was actually awake, or at least he hoped he was. Jihoon had never been this relieved in his life. Except- 

 

“Wait,” Jihoon slowly put his coffee down on the nightstand. 

 

“Yeah?” Seungcheol looked at him innocenty.

 

“You mean to tell me,” Jihoon began carefully, “that you’ve liked me,” he took a deep breath, “For  **_months?!_ ** ” Jihoon took one of his pillows and promptly began to pummel Seungcheol with it. “Why didn’t you say anything, stupid?!” Jihoon was relentless but Seungcheol just laughed. 

 

“Hey! Hey! Mercy!” Jihoon threw himself back on the bed in frustration. All these months of unbearable pining and Seungcheol liked him back the whole time? He let out a sigh. Seungcheol laid down on his side next to Jihoon, smile still refusing to drop.

 

“In my defence,” he began, “you are  _ not _ the easiest person to read.” His smile widened, “but I guess I like your -what was it you called it?-” Seungcheol tapped his chin, pretending to search for words. “Oh, your _ mysterious allure _ .” And then he was grinning again.

 

Jihoon gently whacked Seungcheol’s cheek for that,  _ so stupid,  _ he thought, but he couldn’t help smiling all the same. 

 

“Shut up and kiss me?” 

 

“That can be arranged.”

 


End file.
